Auckland & Transport Minister Simeon Brown's insanity

After battling hard to increase speed limits around schools and high fatality roads, Simeon sets his sights on something much bigger: road cones.

Excuse me, but I just don’t feel like being polite today. What is going on with Simeon Brown? I mean, really?

After spending valuable Ministerial time, focus, and government resources to overturn tailored speed limits in school and high fatality zones that *checks notes* reduces the risk of deaths and injuries, and intentionally kill off cyle-ways that *checks notes* protects cyclists’ lives and reduces emissions, and disallow Councils to implement “road safety or calming measures”, Simeon announced yesterday that he’s now going after the big one: road cones.

---

‘Simeon Brown vs Road Cones’

Simeon seemed unabashed and stupidly unaware when he proudly told news media yesterday.

“Today, we’re announcing a crackdown on road cones.”

That’s wonderful, Minister, very visionary stuff.

I’m so relieved that we have a Minister who cares about the big things, the big blocks, the pressing matters, when it comes to transport and infrastructure around New Zealand. And while I don’t doubt he will get brownie points from a culture of people who have been trained to cheer on anything that isn’t doggedly pro-cars and speed, Simeon continues a consistent streak of looking far less like a ‘Minister for Transport,’ and more like the ‘Minister for Speed-and-Roads.’

Simeon goes on to proudly declare:

“The first thing I asked when I was the Minister was how much is being spent on temporary road traffic management?

Wait. What?

You’re telling us that the very first thing you cared to ask for as the Minister for Transport - overseeing billions of dollars of network infrastructure, health and safety, public transport, service quality, revenue models, transport interconnectivity, future strategic investments, bicycle ways, pedestrian way, roads, rail, ships, emissions and environmental impact - was to ask about the cost of road cones?

Sure.

That too, would be what comes to mind when I think of New Zealand’s first rate, seamless, public transport system, or our excellent inter-and-intra island transport connections.

Or maybe consider what we are famous for, Simeon - two lane highways that trucks crush into little pot-holes, a lack of barriers on busy roads that contribute to fatalities, or maybe the thousands of humans who are seriously injured every year in car accidents.

Did someone tell Simeon about Kiwirail’s Willis-inflicted, pending loss of critical rail enabled functionality and the potential economic hits of that?

Finally, Road to Zero, Minister? There are so many matters competing for your attention.

In 2021, there were 320 lives lost on the roads – nearly a person every day. 2,200 were seriously injured.

From the NZ Transport Agency, Waka Kotahi:

“The Road to Zero strategy adopts a long-term vision of .. reducing annual road deaths to no more than 227 and serious injuries to no more than 1,560 by 2030. 

Deaths and serious injuries are preventable, but reducing crashes is about much more than just how we drive - it’s about all the different parts of the system – roads, vehicles, speeds, and people.”

I’m trying to keep this PG.

But why would he be unaware enough to tell us his actual first question was, and be unabashed about how utterly stupid he actually looks as a Minister of Government?

---

$70bn for roads - Yes! $1.5bn for Interislander - ‘Bad dog.’

I already thought it was insanity when he announced, late on a Friday last month, his $70bn over 10 years investment in roads as part of National’s final Government Policy Statement (‘GPS’) on Land Transport.

i.e. $70bn for roads where you already blew your forecasted budget out by 100% is A-OK, but $1.5bn for Kiwirail to finalise the deal (new terminals and future proof ferries) was vetoed?

Similarly, $3bn for landlords over 4 years and $4bn for pothole contractors over 3 years is easy money to find. But cycleways that cost maybe between ~$70mn to $130mn a year, when invested, is a colossal waste of taxpayers money?

And by the way you didn’t even try to address the root cause for the potholes, Minister - heavy load vehicles. In fact, Minister Brown, your team of yourself, Paul Goldsmith and Nicola Willis have actively manouvered to remove rail enabled functionality that was on the order you cancelled, so you could *checks notes* add more trucks to our roads to keep crushing them for more pothole maintenance money?

$4bn over three years. Big contract money.

From us - taxpayers! See what I mean by “insane?”

Back to the new roads. You will pay for that too. On top of your taxes.

National already broke - without contrition of course (National party? ‘No contrition’) - their promise of new taxes, increasing car registration by $50 over 2025-2026, but that’s not all folks. Then there’s the app tax they kept, alcohol excise increase, prescription fee reinstatement, hitting beneficiaries wallets and the disabled communities, squeezing minimum wage increases to the barest minimum, food bank cuts, cuts to Warmer Homes for Kiwis etc.

Everyone will get to share in electronic road user charges (RUC), and National will lug us all with some nice extra fuel taxes increasing from 12c to + 22c per litre - starting 2027.

Just got to shepherd them all on first, Wilma!

But that’s not all either -

All new roads will come bearing gifts of brand new tolls, which some experts estimate will need to be at least $5 to be economically feasible.

The private operators need their return on investment and it appears that Simeon is doing everything he can to herd the New Zealand people onto roads, while cutting relative investments in public transport, cycleways and footpaths.

---

Showing New Zealand how budget blowouts should be done

National campaigned on a road policy that blew out by some accounts, by a WHOPPING $24bn, by the time they got into Government. That’s months from National Party ‘I’m confident in my numbers’ budget promise to a 200% figure blowout. Not the 3 years and unforseen consequences that Kiwirail experienced.

Not bad, Simeon, not bad at all, for a kid from Rotorua.

Kiwirail, eat your heart out.

On average, National under-budgeted by $16bn - that’s 10.5 times more than the Kiwirail Interislander over-run. Nicola Willis danced proudly on that grave by saying Kiwirail’s doubling of cost from 2021 due to seismic work and inflation was ‘unacceptable’ and incompetence.'

But don’t worry, Simeon’s incorrect numbers from a few months ago, weren’t his fault. It’s always someone else, isn’t it?

In March 2024, in an interview on Q&A, Simeon even had the audacity to blame inflation and consents - did someone not tell him that the inflation rate was well under 100% over the last year? I don’t recall having to pay $120,000 for a top model Toyota GR Corolla. Did he not know about consents too when he campaigned to become Transport Minister?

I’m looking at you though, Labour Party. Evil eye time from Simeon and Nicola coming to a 6’o clock news channel near you soon.

Simeon Brown is the current Minister for Energy, Minister of Local Government, Minister of Transport, Minister for Auckland and Deputy Leader of the House.

---

The anti-environment party at it again

When Jacinda Adern announced $5.3billion in roads in 2020, advocates announced that it would lock in 21 million tonnes of emissions over the next 50 years. They said measures such as encouraging increased uptake of electric vehicles (EV), reducing fossil fuel use, and encouraging alternative modes of transport would be essential.

Labour, together with the Greens, did quite a few of those, with gumption.

However, this government has already tanked all those elements right out of the gate.

One of Simeon’s first actions in Government was to immediately cancel all cycling and walking initiatives  - stopping dozens of council projects designed to encourage cycling, walking and use of public transport across the country.

His $70bn GPS also explicitly forbids Councils from using the money for busways, cycle ways and traffic “calming” measures that promote safety and consideration.

But hey, Councils can use money to strip out existing safety and calming measures. And Waka Kotahi’s main consideration should be travel times and not the obvious lives and limbs of travellers.

His government repealed - under urgency of course - the Clean Car Discount that encouraged uptake of lower-emissions vehicles. Even though official advice found the repeal would lead to increases of 1,200,000 and 2,200,000 tonnes of extra greenhouse pollution over the next three decades. 

And repealing the CCD cost twice what it saved. 

Kaching, National - isn’t that what you say you care about? Taxpayers’ money?

Post repeal, EV sales plummeted. As of May 2024, stats showed clean cars made up just 6% of auto vehicle sales for the period, well down from the 2023 averages of 20%.

Policies matter.

And National is proving that, and more.

---

Would you like this guy as boss?

As an aside, here’s the big fella himself. I can just imagine how it’d feel to work for a boss like this.

Can you?

Does this remind you of a manager you might know, somewhere out there?

A bit of a know-it-all who doesn’t even have the humility to ask you for your perspective from decades of experience, but comes in to tell you what his view of the world is, formed from what appears to be under a rock?

---

Conclusion: Please, Mr Minister

Simeon, I don’t actually care that you had no work experience other than as a BNZ branch worker and community/Church leader, before taking the reins of some of the most important, structurally significant, and heavily monetized portfolios in New Zealand.

I can overlook, for now, that you’re an anti-abortion, anti-LGBTQ activist who once led a group that Auckland students voted to disaffiliate with because of their extreme and anti-human rights views.

Just two days ago, I gave you credit for being one of the few National and ACT senior Government Ministers who was not a former professional lobbyist.

But what in the world is happening here?

You’re a candidate who told New Zealand that you care about integrity. You’re a leader in your Church’s circles who told New Zealand your faith guides and informs who you are and how you deal with others. You said that you understand the value of compassion for families who struggle.

But what you are showing us is that you’re more committed to some small minded, self-made-up idea of “efficiency” that consists of people flooring it to wherever they are going, as if those few extra minutes will boost ANY productivity in real life - with or without their lives and limbs.

You’re telling us you don’t give a rat’s ass about nature or our environment. Or put that ‘woke’ stuff aside and let’s just say, people who enjoy and appreciate fresh air, good health, and exercise. Are they not worth much on your imaginary economic abacus?

You’re showing us you are not very economically astute or responsible when you keep forking out billions to road contractors and private companies, while taking from taxpayers to help them fund their investments on us.

You’re showing you don’t have a vision for the country outside of asphalt and fumes when you forgo investment in public transport, bus lanes, cycle ways, and human safety, while tapping down on clean emission requirements from vehicle manufacturers.

And you’re showing a very concerning lack of empathy and human connectivity, when, after you are told that 80% of Auckland schools don’t want higher speed limits around their schools and some have multi-block structures that require road crossings, say,

“It's a bit of a surprise that they want to back one of Labour's most unpopular policies, which was simply to slow people down, and make it harder to get around and more inconvenient.”

Besides coming across as a bit of know-it-all again, there’s also no innovation in what you’re doing, Mr Minister.

You’ve copied and pasted old 1980s policies and are pushing it as if it’s either relevant, viable, or anything short of economically stupid and lazy.

And despite your enthusiasm for Auckland’s East-West link, which at $350 million or so per kilometer, making it the most expensive build in the world after Russia.

Did you know? By kilometer, the i-Rex ferries $33 million per km.

Infrastructure advocates and economists just don’t think the East-West link is a good idea either. In 2017, the road was costing closer to $2bn so given National’s 100% inflation increase for roads from 2023 to 2023, what is the present cost-benefit?

And despite all the fireworks and distraction from your ‘efficiency-productivity-money-don’t inconvenience cars’ bingo card, let’s be clear Minister:

Evidence consistently shows us speed limits saves lives and saves limbs. Tailored speed limits, as the last government did, is best practice and cuts road deaths by nearly half.

Climate change continues to cause more severe weather events, and major insurance companies around the world model it into every actuarial scenario - that hits your wallets - for a reason.

It’s time to get serious, Simeon.

Edit: Someone asked me about the Auckland Light Rail estimate - this was one I didn’t calculate myself. Source: original plans. I’ve removed it pending review. I’m confident in all other sources. Thanks.